What Is Dazi Culture? Why China’s “Activity-Only Friendships” Might Save Us From Ourselves
Thursday, September 18, 2025. This is for my private practice supervisor, Dr. Kyle Killian, who trusted me to help train Chinese marriage and family therapists with him.
The word dazi (搭子) comes from Shanghai slang for “card-playing buddy.”
Back then, you sat down, slapped cards on the table, and didn’t necessarily exchange birthdays.
Now? The same stripped-down logic applies to almost anything: dinner, karaoke, the gym.
By 2024–2025, dazi had gone viral on Chinese platforms like Xiaohongshu and WeChat.
According to Radii China, young people are openly advertising for “meal dazi” or “travel dazi,” and not pretending it means forever friendship.
Researchers now call this “precise companionship”—the opposite of the emotional sinkhole of expectation so many of us call conventional Western “friendship” (China Daily).
How Big Is It?
Global Times reports that in 2024, dazi-related posts racked up nearly 13 million mentions and 3.33 billion interactions on Chinese platforms (Global Times).
A survey by China Youth Daily and Wenjuan.com found 72.6% of respondents already had one or more dazi. Nearly 69% said it felt like a bold new way to socialize (China Daily).
When was the last time any Western survey got 70% of people to agree on anything?
What Makes Dazi Work
The dazi bargain is beautifully blunt:
Boundaries are baked in: You’re my karaoke buddy, not my emergency contact.
Lower cost of entry: No need to be soulmates; we just need to split the bill.
No long-term maintenance fees: We can go quiet the second the activity ends.
As ECNS put it, dazi relationships cut the “social cost” because you don’t have to juggle someone else’s entire messy personality—just their appetite for noodles (ECNS).
So Why Isn’t It Just Another Situationship?
Ah, the West’s contribution to modern malaise: the situationship.
Romantic limbo, ambiguous texting, occasional intimacy, and research-verified misery. A 2025 Baylor study confirms what every group chat already knew: people in situationships report lower satisfaction and commitment than those in defined relationships.
Attachment theory lines up like so:
Avoidant types adore situationships—emotional intimacy without the mess (Cleveland Clinic).
Anxious types cling to them like a half-inflated life raft, praying for it to become marriage.
A systematic review found over half of young adults have been in one. In other words, the majority of people under thirty have experienced marinating in ambiguity.
Dazi, by contrast, is gloriously clear:
Situationship = intimacy subscription with hidden fees.
Dazi = karaoke date, full stop.
One thrives on ambiguity; the other thrives on clarity. Guess which is kinder to your nervous system?
Is Dazi Uniquely Chinese—or Just Better Packaged?
The cultural flavor is Chinese, but the appetite is global.
In Japan, you can literally rent a friend or family member. That’s dazi with a receipt.
In South Korea, the honjok trend celebrates doing things solo—dauntingly similar logic, just lonelier branding.
In the West, apps like Bumble For Friends and Meetup are already dazi farms in disguise. Expect Silicon Valley to trademark “Micro-Friending™” and charge you $7.99 a month for the privilege.
So no, dazi isn’t uniquely Chinese. China just had the nerve to name it.
Will Dazi Travel Well?
Almost certainly. The West imported hygge, commodified self-care, and turned bullet journaling into a cult. A neat little word like dazi is practically begging for a New Yorker trend piece and a Netflix docuseries.
And frankly? If it spares even a few million people from languishing in situationships—this cultural export is overdue.
Dazi is not a quirky footnote in Shanghai slang.
It’s the practical cousin at the reunion, sipping tea while situationships torch the backyard.
One says, “We’re here for karaoke, not existential crisis.” The other says, “We might be soulmates—unless I ghost you first.”
Which one sounds like an emotionally healther future?
Be Well, Stay Kind, and Godspeed.
REFERENCES:
China Daily. (2025, February 17). Gen Z embrace “dazi culture” for efficient socializing. China Daily.
Global Times. (2025, March 29). Evolution of China’s “dazi culture” among young generation. Global Times.
ECNS. (2024, February 29). “Dazi culture” increasingly popular among young Chinese. ECNS.
China Youth Daily & Wenjuan.com. (2023, June 16). Survey on young people’s experience with dazi. Report via China Daily epaper.
PsyPost. (2025, August 4). New psychology research reveals why people stay in situationships. PsyPost.
Cleveland Clinic. (2023, July 25). Situationships: What they are and 5 signs you’re in one. Cleveland Clinic.
ResearchGate. (2024, November 19). Attitudes and perceptions towards situationships among young adults – A systematic review. ResearchGate.
JoongAng Daily. (2025, February 14). Honjok: South Korea’s one-person tribe. JoongAng Daily.
Washington Post. (2024, November 9). The rise of friendship apps. Washington Post.
The Guardian. (2025, February 18). The rise of friendship apps: Loneliness goes global. The Guardian.