Emotional Regulation in Preschool: The Early Predictor of ADHD and Conduct Problems
Wednesday, January 22, 2025. This for Ellen, Josie, Davy, and their saint-like parents. LOL
So imagine a preschooler dissolves into tears because they didn’t get the red cup they wanted. At first glance, it’s a typical kid moment, right?
But what if those meltdowns keep happening, growing into bigger challenges over time? Emotional regulation—the ability to manage big feelings—plays a huge role in helping kids thrive.
When this skill doesn’t develop as expected, it can lead to struggles with ADHD, behavior issues, and even anxiety or depression.
A recent study in Development and Psychopathology shines a light on how early emotional regulation impacts kids’ mental health by age seven. Let’s unpack these findings with a mix of warmth, research, and practical insights.
What Is Emotional Regulation, and Why Does It Matter?
Think of emotional regulation as a child’s “pause button” for feelings. It’s what lets a little one manage frustration when their block tower falls or bounce back after losing at Candyland. It’s not something kids are born knowing how to do—it’s a skill they learn, like tying their shoes or riding a bike.
When kids master emotional regulation, they can:
Make friends more easily by navigating tricky social moments.
Stay focused in school, even when things don’t go their way.
Handle life’s ups and downs without getting completely overwhelmed.
But for some kids, this skill doesn’t come as naturally. Persistent emotional dysregulation—think mood swings, impulsivity, or trouble calming down—can make everything from school to playdates feel like an uphill battle.
The Research: What We Know About Emotional Regulation and Mental Health
A team of researchers at the University of Oxford dug deep into this topic, analyzing data from over 14,000 children as part of the UK’s Millennium Cohort Study (Calderón Alfaro et al., 2025). They tracked emotional regulation skills at ages three, five, and seven through parent surveys to see how those early years shaped later outcomes.
Here’s what they found:
ADHD Symptoms: Kids who struggled to regulate emotions at age three were more likely to show signs of ADHD by age 7.
Behavioral Challenges: Difficulty managing anger or frustration predicted more conduct problems, like aggression or defiance.
Anxiety and Sadness: Emotional dysregulation was linked to internalizing behaviors, such as withdrawal and worry.
Perhaps the most eye-opening takeaway? Children who showed the least improvement in emotional regulation between ages 3 and 7 were at the highest risk for these issues.
Boys, Girls, and Emotional Regulation
While all kids benefit from strong emotional regulation, the study found some differences between boys and girls:
Boys: They were more likely to show externalizing behaviors like tantrums, aggression, and rule-breaking.
Girls: They were more likely to turn their struggles inward, showing signs of anxiety or sadness.
These differences remind us that emotional regulation is a crucial skill for every child, no matter their gender.
Why Emotional Regulation Sets the Stage for Success
Emotional regulation is like a foundational bedrock for a healthy, happy life. When kids can manage their emotions, they’re better equipped to:
Focus in Class: Emotional outbursts can disrupt learning, but a well-regulated child can stay engaged.
Navigate Friendships: Sharing, taking turns, and resolving conflicts are all easier with good emotional control.
Avoid Mental Health Struggles: Emotional regulation reduces the risk of anxiety, depression, and behavioral issues.
One study even found a “chicken-and-egg” relationship between ADHD and emotional dysregulation. ADHD can make regulating emotions harder, and in turn, poor emotional regulation can make ADHD symptoms worse (Seymour et al., 2021).
Helping Kids Build Emotional Regulation Skills
The great news? Emotional regulation isn’t fixed—it’s a skill kids can learn, with a little help from the adults in their lives. Here are some strategies to get started:
Label Feelings: Help kids name their emotions. “You seem really frustrated right now. Let’s take a deep breath together.”
Be Their Role Model: Kids watch how we handle stress. When you stay calm during chaos, you’re showing them how it’s done.
Create Predictable Routines: A steady schedule helps kids feel secure, which makes it easier for them to manage emotions.
Teach Problem-Solving: Encourage kids to come up with solutions when things don’t go their way.
Seek Support When Needed: If your child’s struggles feel overwhelming, a counselor or psychologist can provide tailored tools and guidance.
Looking Ahead: Why Early Intervention Matters
This research underscores the power of addressing emotional regulation early. While some kids might need a little more support to develop these skills, small steps can lead to big progress. As Francisco Antonio Calderón Alfaro and his team remind us, identifying these challenges early opens the door to meaningful interventions.
So, the next time your child struggles to manage their emotions, remember: this is a moment of growth, not defeat. With love, patience, and support, they can learn the tools to navigate life’s twists and turns with resilience.
Let’s Hear From You
Have tips, stories, or questions about helping kids develop emotional regulation?
Share them in the comments! Raising emotionally resilient kids is a team effort, and your insight could help another parent on their journey.
Be Well, Stay Kind, and Godspeed.
REFERENCES:
Calderón Alfaro, F. A., Murray, A. L., & Russell, A. (2025). Early emotion regulation developmental trajectories and ADHD, internalizing, and conduct problems symptoms in childhood. Development and Psychopathology.
Gross, J. J. (2015). Emotion regulation: Current status and future prospects. Psychological Inquiry, 26(1), 1–26.
Seymour, K. E., Chronis-Tuscano, A., Halldorsdottir, T., Stupica, B., & Owens, K. (2021). Emotional dysregulation and ADHD: Links to comorbid internalizing and externalizing behaviors. Clinical Child and Family Psychology Review, 24(2), 155–174.
Zahn-Waxler, C., Klimes-Dougan, B., & Slattery, M. J. (2000). Internalizing problems of childhood and adolescence: Prospects, pitfalls, and progress in understanding the development of anxiety and depression. Development and Psychopathology, 12(3), 443–466.