Romantic AI Is Surprisingly Common—And It May Be Hurting Mental Health
Sunday, September 7, 2025.
AI isn’t just in your workplace—it’s also in your love life.
A new study in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships found that a surprising number of Americans are experimenting with AI-generated romance. Young men, in particular, are chatting with AI “partners,” following AI-generated accounts, and consuming AI porn. And the more people use these tools, the more likely they are to report depression and lower life satisfaction.
AI Romance Trends: From Novelty to Normal
Romantic AI isn’t fringe anymore. Nearly one in five adults have tried an AI “romantic partner,” and over a quarter of young adults have done so (Willoughby et al., 2025).
Even more striking, people in committed relationships are morelikely than singles to engage with romantic AI.
This lines up with research on parasocial relationships—the one-way emotional bonds we form with media figures, now upgraded to chatbots that never roll their eyes.
Does AI Make Us Lonely? The Evidence Is Mixed
The U.S. survey showed clear associations: more AI use linked with higher depression and lower life satisfaction (Willoughby et al., 2025).
A separate study found that depression predicts AI companion use via loneliness, especially among young men.
But experiments complicate the story. In a multi-study trial, participants randomly assigned to chat with AI companions actually felt less lonely—not more. The key was whether the AI made them feel “heard.” Empathy, even synthetic empathy, works.
AI Porn and Mental Health: A Riskier Zone
Romantic chat is one thing—AI porn is another. Reviews show that problematic pornography use is tied to depression and distress.
Now add in AI-generated porn, which can manufacture endless novelty and deepfake harms. For therapists, this isn’t just a sexual ethics issue—it’s also a relational one.
Still, it’s not fair to say every form of digital sex is harmful.
Studies on sexting clearly show that it doesn’t predict depression or behavioral problems once other factors are accounted for. And digital sex-ed interventions have even been shown to improve sexual health outcomes. Once again, context is everything.
Why Some People Prefer Bots to Humans
Feeling Heard. Empathic responses from AI reduce loneliness (Ho et al., 2023).
Sexual Novelty. Endless AI content can reset expectations in ways real partners can’t match.
Substitution. In one survey, 20% of users said they’d rather talk to their bot than a person (Willoughby et al., 2025).
Accessibility. AI never gets tired, critical, or bored—features that can soothe anxious attachment, but at the cost of avoiding conflict growth.
The Future of AI and Intimacy
The research consensus is this: romantic AI isn’t going away, and it isn’t inherently “good” or “bad.”
For some, AI companions offer comfort. For others, they reinforce isolation or set impossible standards for human relationships.
The therapist’s job—and society’s—is to ask harder questions: Is this a Band-Aid, a training wheel, or a wedge that deepens loneliness? I remain profoundly skeptical of the benefits.
As Willoughby put it: AI companions already have traction. The rest of us need to catch up.
Be Well, Stay Kind, and Godspeed.
REFERENCES:
Bailey, J. V., Wayal, S., Hunter, R., Free, C., Abraham, C., & Murray, E. (2022). Sexual health promotion for young people delivered via digital media: A systematic review. American Journal of Preventive Medicine, 62(2), 231–244. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.amepre.2022.01.004
Dibble, J. L., Hartmann, T., & Rosaen, S. F. (2016). Parasocial interaction and parasocial relationship: Conceptual clarification and a critical assessment of measures. Journal of Communication, 66(1), 21–44. https://doi.org/10.1111/jcom.12200
Grubbs, J. B., Volk, F., Exline, J. J., & Pargament, K. I. (2015). Internet pornography use: Perceived addiction, psychological distress, and the validation of a brief measure. Communication Research, 42(5), 659–683. https://doi.org/10.1177/0093650215600491
Ho, A., Hancock, J. T., & Naaman, M. (2023). AI companions reduce loneliness by increasing perceptions of being heard. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin. https://doi.org/10.1177/19485506231185911
Liu, D., Shi, X., & Liu, C. (2023). Depression and loneliness as predictors of AI companion use among young adults. Sexuality & Culture, 27(4), 1910–1931. https://doi.org/10.1007/s12119-023-10092-y
Stubbs-Richardson, M., & Anton, J. (2023). Artificially generated sexual content and deepfake harms: Ethical challenges in the era of AI pornography. Journal of Media Ethics, 38(3–4), 159–175. https://doi.org/10.1080/19317611.2023.2197983
van Ouytsel, J., Walrave, M., Ponnet, K., & Temple, J. R. (2020). Sexting and psychosocial health: A longitudinal study among early adolescents. Journal of Early Adolescence, 40(4), 485–509. https://doi.org/10.1177/0743558420907082
Willoughby, B. J., Dover, C. R., Hakala, R. M., & Carroll, J. S. (2025). Artificial connections: Romantic relationship engagement with artificial intelligence in the United States. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships. https://doi.org/10.1177/02654075251309856